When I speak to singles groups, the question I hear more than any other question is, “How did you know John was the one?”
Before we were married, like most other singles, I had my “list”. I knew what I wanted. I wanted someone older, sophisticated and well established and although John was nice, he didn’t have any of those qualities. He was younger, goofy and still in college—the exact opposite of what I was looking for. Left to my own romantic discernment, I would have overlooked John. But thank goodness, God knew my list was defective. My discernment was compromised. My picker was busted: I picked the wrong man every time.
It was a Wednesday evening after work on January 28, 1998. John had driven up from Lawton after his classes since I had invited him for dinner. With three small children, going out to eat was a rare occurrence. After dessert, we plopped down on the worn blue sofa in my TV room when John asked, “Do you mind if I pray?” To this day, I don’t even remember what his prayer was about, but what happened next, I’ll never forget:
An overwhelming presence of peace engulfed me and I felt my heart, not my physical heart, but the heart of my soul, being knit together with John. I know it sounds cheesy, but it’s the only way I can describe the supernatural experience that took place. I say “supernatural” because in the natural, I wouldn’t have picked John. He wasn’t my type.
But here’s the deal: I never had much success in the relationship department. God knew that without a divine revelation I would go back to devastation.
The next morning I marched in the office and announced to my single coworker, Julie, “I’m going to marry John.” He hadn’t even proposed yet, but I knew. I knew John was God’s pick, not Christy’s pick. I knew John was a divine hook up, a heavenly match—not a good choice, but a God choice.
Later when conflicts arose in our relationship, it was this revelation that brought back peace. When tensions threaten my peace, if I run back to my heavenly Father for a fill up, my supply of strength and peace will never run out.
How about you? What revelations about relationships have helped you maintain your peace?
If you’re married, how would you encourage a single woman who asks the age old question, “How did you know he was the one?”