My name is Christy also. I am single and in my late twenties. I have been in the “dating game” for about ten years now. As you can imagine, after so long, with a list of failed relationships a mile long, you begin to wonder, what am I doing wrong? How do I keep ending up with the wrong men and in unhealthy relationships that are only hurting me? I did not realize I was a relationship junkie and addicted to the game of dating until I read Christy’s book, Love Junkies.
I have always wanted to find a godly man, someone who would lead me closer to Christ, and fight to protect my purity and integrity. But somehow, I constantly ended up falling for men who were the complete opposite.
I was in a very dark place when I stumbled onto Love Junkies. I was so far from where I wanted to be relationally and had been through my fair share of heartbreaks. I had given up any hope of being able to change and to break the cycle, even though I prayed constantly for this. So I accepted that this was what I should expect when it comes to relationships. And with that, I began to devalue myself. I did not believe I deserved a godly man or that I was worthy to have a healthy, successful relationship because of my past with men. This created an even bigger problem though. Once I began believing those lies, I slipped even further from what my heart truly desired and settled for one toxic relationship after the next. The enemy had convinced me this was what I deserved.
As I started to read Christy’s book, I was shocked to find that I was not the only one who struggled to stay out of toxic relationships. As I poured over the words in Love Junkies my heart began to hope again, that maybe there was a way out. That I could break the cycle. I read the book cover to cover in two days. And I was hungry for more, but felt stuck. I wholeheartedly wanted to live out and practice the principles that are outlined in the book in effort to break the cycle, but I found myself feeling overwhelmed and wondering, “How can I do this?”
I’ve read relationship book after book and every Christian self-help book out there on how to change. But nothing has ever worked. Until I stumbled onto Christy’s website for the book and discovered she offered “coaching.”
I had no clue what this was. I thought it was like counseling. But I’ve been to counseling, yet still remained stuck. I emailed and inquired to find out more about coaching, and one week later I was sitting in front of Christy herself, talking about my dysfunctional relationship past.
For anyone who is stuck, and looking to change your life radically, I earnestly urge you to consider coaching with Christy. Her experience and wisdom together help give you the tools to start the change—to help break away from toxic, unhealthy relationships. It will be work. But I believe with all of my heart it is worth your time and effort if you are seeking to change your path. I can honestly say that after ten years of struggling, with Gods power and my coaching sessions with Christy, I finally broke free. Finally I have found freedom from the chains of toxic relationships. With Christy’s help I now have the tools I need to continue in this season of singleness and have confidence that the next time I find myself considering being in a relationship, I will make the best decision and walk in it with wisdom.
There first time I read this it was after I prayed to God and was expecting and answer. I opened my bible app and found the Love Junkies plan and I was shocked to even know that there is a thing called love junky and I have to admit I am one of them, it is a new road to my freedom, its like I am lifting weights to build my muscles because its taking out all the junk in my mind and system. I am now exercising my mind to think differently, emotions not to say ” I love you” even when I am don’t mean it but just afraid of being alone. Truly this is my breakthrough to my happy and open marriage I have been praying about. Thank you Christy for being bold to answer God’s call over this ministry to set us free. Blessing and grace to you.
I’m so glad God answered your prayer. I love how He guides us into all wisdom and shows us great and mighty things we do not know! Keep growing in Him! The best in yet to come:)
I had the same experience. My Bible app had daliy plans, I found love junkies. I was very drawn to it. However I was trying to deny it was me. 2 weeks that would continuly pop up in the app. Well my very Godly man of 6 years was fed up with my outburst of jealousy. He loudly told me he didn’t care how I felt. He is 61 and told me he doesn’t have to check in with anyone for approval. I was devastated. I had already did the daily plan. Ordered the book, but couldn’t read the book. I would cry constantly, but not really understanding why. Well I decided I had hung on to this far 2 long. 3 failed abusive marriages. Then a stroke in the last toxic marriage. I was down for the count. I stayed 13 years, because my 3 children kept saying, Are you breaking this up. I felt like I had let everyone down. I knew I had to leave the relationship, I was in danger. I then moved to my parents who have a very toxic marriage. I knew it was only a season. Divorce was horrible, I was desperate for healing. I got SSD and moved into my little dream duplex. I had space, garden, fires with grandkids and I felt lots of release of the ugly and received everything God wanted to give me. I worked on me for 4 years single, no man. It was freeing. Well at 56 I thought this jealousy was with me forever, I had no idea how to heal that. I was pushing this lovely man away, I felt it and it broke my heart. I had waited many a year for him. I decided I’m ready, to release this and heal. Thank you for sharing. It’s given me more encouragement. I’m so excited to begin healing.
God bless.
Please read the book, Vale! I especially want to encourage you to not just read but take the time to do all of the action points in the chapters. I think it will bring so much clarity and healing!
I would like to read nd learn more I’m also a love junky still in a toxic , hurtfully , abusive relationship with the father of my children , he’s in prison now for the 1st time being away from me for a month now ND I’m starting to get used to it but still feels he’s the one having strong faith he’s gonna be a better father ND man for me ND our kids..
My love for him grows deeper ND deeper everyday nommater the distance between us now it feels like it just getting stronger ND stronger…
What do u think ND what should I do.
You ask what you should do? No one can answer that except for you, but I wonder if the separation has made you forget or rationalize some of the pain. You say he’s abusive, toxic and hurtful. Those qualities, if they are going to change, take time and a commitment to recovery. Has your craving for love made you compromise some of your values? What about boundaries? This time apart would be a good time for you to get firm on what that looks like for you in the future so that you can guard your heart and make sure that you’re not falling for empty promises.
I found you on my Bible app. I was seeking devotionals to study. A couple months ago a sister in Christ set me up with a friend she’s known for over 20 years. She raved about this man, even said she wished she’d had the chance to marry him. He is a wonderful person, big heart, and willing to do what needs to be done to make the relationship work. The only problem…we have similiar hurts and baggage. Unfortunately we let the emotions and chemistry get the better of us and moved too fast. During our second month, he was having a very rough time emotionally , dealing with life as a 50 + old ful time single dad to to young girls, and working past a very emotional anniversary, along with pursuing a much desired relationship with me. I could see him crumbling but didn’t know how to approach it. He finally broke down a couple weeks ago, admitted he was scared of our relationship, more scared of screwing it up due to past habits, begging to start over. Fast forward, he for the first time has sought out a therapist, for himself and his kids. He admitted he is not emotionally ready just yet. I have sought out a therapist and will be working through a church led therapy group as well. I had the revelation just before I met him that it was finally time to work on myself. I’d had a horrible abusive failed marriage and one toxic relationship after another, but due to finances I only had my daughter in therapy. He has a similar past. In the meantime this relationship is no longer. I pray that we will be able to reconnect along down the line, but also realistically know that this may not be a possibility. Christy, as I read through your blogs I see so much of where I’ve failed throughout the years, and where I need to work and heal. I am so ready for change.
Change is hard and scary, but so worth the work! I pray you find the total healing that you need Suzi!