Before online dating services like eHarmony and Match.com® there were telephone dating services. Trust me, they didn’t have the stamp of approval that singles sites have today. I was one of the lab rats that paved the way for singles today. Adventuring into electronic social circles to find romance was risky business-but I was desperate.
“Be careful,” my friends warned. “He might be lying about who he is.”
Really? Some guys lie?
“He could be a rapist.”
Oh, and the guy you met in line at Target buying panty hose for his “sister” is safe? And what about the dream guy from the carwash? Don’t tell me he comes with a warranty?
But like a decent friend, I silenced my thoughts with a polite response.”I’m being careful.”
“Why don’t you just try to find a guy in church?” they would query.
“It’s not like church is the only place to meet guys. Besides, my calendar only shows one Sunday every week and I don’t have all year.”
In all honesty, my friends were concerned. They had good reason. I’ve had my share of dating disasters. Why couldn’t a relationship have dummy lights like my vehicle-a little warning light that blinks or beeps to signal danger? This would be very helpful. I’ve dated a lot of hot Rods and too many devils in Dockers.
Truth is there are counterfeits everywhere. Even in church. I once met a guy in service. He was full of the spirit alright. His best friends were Bud Wiser, Johnny Walker, C. Graham Seven and Jack Daniels. They were all in church with him that morning. You could almost see smell their praises ascending into heaven.
and choir lofts attract other great pretenders. The kind of guys that walk their dog in the park to attract women-they do it in church too. Not walk dogs…but carry things.
To attract women.
A Bible can be a great chic magnet. Makes even gangsters and car salesmen look safe. Friendly. Trustworthy. Especially if it has his own name engraved on it. Now, I’m not knocking car salesmen and guys who tote Bibles. Most of these guys are legit. But some are merely veneer. Stay clear. You’ve seen them-the fake Jakes and faux Pauls.
That’s why it’s imperative that you not only take Daters Ed but cover yourself with wisdom and accountability. We all have blind spots when it comes to love. When I’m driving, I have to look over my shoulder before switching lanes. Without a rear-view mirror, I may crash and burn.
So take things slow when you are getting to know a guy. And the same goes for you guys too. I mean, come on.
Employers check references.
Banks require collateral.
Apartments demand a security deposit.
But singles everywhere hop in a relationship and drive it faster than a Maserati, risking their most valuable possession-their heart. Too many singles assume that everything a potential love interest says is certified but everyone puts their best foot forward in the beginning of a relationship. That’s why it is so important to complete an inspection. Evaluating character takes time but one thing is certain-the truth comes out eventually.
Just don’t get in a hurry. Slow down. Look over your shoulder and proceed with caution.